Bunny Business

Why is Easter particularly tough? 🐰

Our kids crave predictability. We all do.

That’s why I think of the human brain as a prediction machine, as one fascinating illusion demonstrates.

In David Robson’s excellent book ‘The Expectation Effect’, he explains how the above picture was placed in the zoo. In October, 90% of visitors reported seeing a bird looking to the left. At Easter, just 20% saw a bird, with most now seeing a rabbit looking to the right. For children under 10, almost 100% saw a rabbit.

School holidays can feel like a nice break, but they can also feel like all routines and boundaries have disappeared, which can play havoc with our prediction machines.

• Blurred lines between reality and fantasy
  • Talking bunnies
  • Jesus rising from the dead
• Unrealistic expectations from the media
  • TV shows where kids eat chocolate for breakfast
  • Homes with Hollywood design budgets
  • Epic YouTube egg hunts

So. Much. Chocolate. 🍫

I’m not sure if you’ve noticed, but kids love chocolate.

Studies in animals have suggested sugar can activate reward systems more strongly than cocaine. Sugar’s addictive potential—especially in children—is widely recognised. For children who’ve experienced chronic stress, there appears to be an increased preference for high-fat, high-sugar “comfort” foods to dampen the stress response. In terms of brain development, we know that reward and stress regulation systems are altered by early trauma. Cheap milk chocolate (the kind Easter eggs are often made from) contains high sugar levels and is easier to overconsume than darker varieties.

Some good news for us adults... research has shown high-cocoa dark chocolate may reduce cortisol and support stress regulation.

My Easter Survival Strategies

Strategy #1: Chocolate as dessert

This might seem obvious, but getting caught up in the Easter madness is easy. Chocolate for breakfast may seem ludicrous on a school morning, but we sometimes go a little loopy amid a two-week school holiday.

🐣 👉 Stick to chocolate after food, ideally, after protein.

Strategy #2: Things that aren’t chocolate

Avoid going full Easter Grinch and banning the whole thing by making it a fun weekend beyond the chocolate. Easter-themed activities can exist without chocolate dominating the conversation (despite what the supermarkets might tell us). There’s a great selection of Easter-themed craft activities available online or in some lower-cost craft/hobby/buy-anything type shops.

🐣 👉 Remember there’s more to Easter than chocolate.

Strategy #3: BUT... Don’t forget the chocolate!

Our kids are often highly attuned to fairness and have often lived a life where missing out on something could have very serious consequences. We can alleviate a lot of worry by buying some Easter eggs and ensuring everyone knows they’re here, and nobody will miss out this year.

🐣 👉 Reassure children by getting the eggs in early.

Strategy #4: Egg hunts (now with added structure)

The typical mad scramble for chocolate may leave your home looking a little worse off, and will only serve to unsettle our kids further. There is another way. Slow the process down. Use clues and puzzles to help them find the following location. Build in movement and challenges to jump, skip, and hop. Include small pieces of chocolate if you like, but try to aim for something where the chocolate no longer matters.

🐣 👉 Make egg hunts about movement and connection, not chocolate.

Strategy #5: Scaffolding, structure, and routine

Non-therapeutic parents won’t get this. They don’t need to. But for our kids, when their lives feel chaotic and the world feels terrifying again, we know what helps is a sense of routine. Yes, school holidays are a chance to do things differently, but that doesn't need to mean no routines. A later wake-up time is different from no wake-up time. Keep morning and evening routines fairly similar, and use visual calendars for two weeks. Don’t forget, routine helps regulate cortisol production.

🐣 👉 Adjust routines, but don’t ditch them.

Strategy #6: The jar of joy

We would do this over the summer when my kids were younger. I wish we did it more often. Leading up to a school holiday, everyone can write a fun idea on paper and put it into the jar. There are no rules for ideas (days out, film nights, an extra hour in bed each morning). As the holiday approaches, the ideas are sorted through as a family and put on the visual calendar.

🐣 👉 Get everyone involved in planning the time off from school.

Strategy #7: Be mindful of gifts

Thoughtful, kind, wonderful friends and family often like buying chocolate for kids at Easter (is it possible to type through gritted teeth?). My frustration and worry don't quite outdo my British politeness overdrive. And so, rather than throwing the chocolate on the floor and walking off, I would say thank you and store it away, ready to be dispensed sensibly over a longer period of time.

🐣 👉 Build gifts into existing rules and structure.

That’s it. Hope you found it helpful.

Thanks to Dave Edwards and Amanda Mauger-Jones, colleagues at The Centre of Excellence in Child Trauma. Recently, we ran a one-hour workshop on Easter, which was massively helpful in preparing this piece.